It has been two weeks since I left my first official job and sometimes I wish I had left earlier - in December last year after my first contract ran its course. 23 December 2016 was a Friday and it was nearing Christmas and naturally everyone was in a jolly mood. And a certain someone still cares. It could have been the perfect ending but I did not allow myself to end things (yet) coz I thought for once, maybe I could have a real shot at happiness. Then again, I could say that I have tried.
23 December 2016; Lunch situation at M06 Holland Room
I remembered that one time my recruitment consultant called and mentioned about trying for a contract position at AbbVie, I was actually barely sitting upright in bed, still groggy from sleep. And in the back of my mind, I was like - okay, this company sounds familiarrrrrrrrrr now where have I heard it ????? Then, an image flashed and I could hear a voice droning on. I was an intern at Abbott (Manufacturing Singapore) during the summer holidays of my final year in university and new hires were required to attend orientations at both the Tuas plant itself and at their Harbourfront commercial office (they are gonna move to Bugis tho). It was during one of the Harbourfront orientations (and it had been the nth day ok) that I was seated in one of those swivel chairs listening (maybe not listening) to yet another department representative talk about their operations or services or products. I think it was during the EPD section when they briefly mentioned about how AbbVie split from Abbott in 2013 and that they are doing really well now and I remember thinking to myself "wow cool" and that was the last thought given to AbbVie - and that was in June 2015.
Fast forward one year later, and I found myself not knowing what to expect on my first day of work (which was a Friday btw) and right at the beginning, I wasn't sure about many things, but most of all I wasn't sure about myself. And I don't think being selectively social help matters. Not that I fawn over anyone in particular, just that sometimes you vibe better with certain people ????? And the thing about being new is that people try to be nice, until they decide that you are not on their side (which is really lame coz it feels like school all over again; basically they need to grow up and their mindsets need to glow up) So yes, it took me some time to find my bearings, and ALOTTT of perseverance to just show up at work (coz dealing w toxic people somehow saps energy out the hell of you)
From the outset, I knew my main job scope would be very administrative based. Initially, it really was. But I needed that time to just make peace with Excel (which is something I cannot really excel at lol) - it's like that kind of basic stuff like setting print area I only learnt it on the job, and this is exactly why I'm gonna sign up for an Excel class (with Sha, and probably only in May). And until I become an Excel expert, Google is my best friend. I mean it has always been ????? Anyhoo, I am sooooo much more comfortable using Excel now. Still noob, but so much better. (At least I can successfully pivot a table now, and I don't get anxiety attacks anymore)
Also, I really appreciate the chance to touch on Recruitment - from bringing candidates in / sending them out (omg I swear I clock miles just from walking from my desk to the guardhouse and back; and I always take the stairs whenever possible) Sometimes that few minutes of interaction alr tells so much about someone, and contrary to popular belief, I actually did not mind doing the "legwork" coz it's my only chance to get a glimpse of a candidate's character. And that one time I got to do the preliminary phone screening for the management trainee positions (which looks more like real work to be honest) And being heavily involved in the recruitment of the second wave BOOST (and half of the third wave lol coz I left too early) was a nice experience as well. In fact, sometimes I feel like I learnt more about the biopharma industry more than any HR functions - but when it comes to relations with people, AbbVie has been a good training ground. Over time you realize relationships are in a state of flux, and there would be no need to get hung up on things that will not matter five years down the road.
And the monthly birthday celebrations totally push me out of my comfort zone. It's like I can host in my own sucky way lol, but I would prefer not to ????? And the thing is, the celebrations had been discontinued, starting from this month onward (like seriously, only after I left ?????) Ok, I see that as HR training as well (anything unpleasant falls under the category of 'HR training') Please don't get me wrong - birthdays per se are not unpleasant; the fact that I have to put myself out there is.
And did I mention it's a small small world coz #1, the person whom I replaced (and coincidentally the one replacing me now) was Evi from SP!! We were both from DHRMP (our cohort wasn't that big - about 80 pax) but pretty sure we were oblivious to each other's existence until we came together for a group project in this math class. And now both our lives machiam intertwined coz of AbbVie hahaha which is a funny thing coz I felt closer to her in that one week I did my handover than in the three years that we were coursemates, but still glad things came full circle (: And #2, I came across three names from resumes which made me go "omg I know this person" - there's a junior from Girl Guides in secondary school who is now in the BOOST program for Biotech, another upper sec classmate who tried for the management trainee position (I heard from the others that he was so shocked to see me again after like ten years omfg that is a really long time but apparently he hid his emotions quite well), and this close friend of my cousin who was referred by some employee from Engineering.
You know, I have all along been good at burning bridges. I can be gone, and stay gone. But this time, I did not actually want to ????? It's not always doom and gloom in the office - there were actually good times, and kind people who made everything much more bearable with their companionship. I will miss the way the ice (not those crushed ones) hit the sides of my mug whenever I gently shake it - the sound it makes is one of my favourite ones hahaha (a certain someone's voice is another), and that only happens when I make Thai milk tea with Sha in the canteen's pantry. In fact, I have so many things to remember these people by - my first generation bus khakis (who happen to be really good at bowling), the leap year babies, the trance / foodie guy, the overhead bridge peepz, the three musketeers, the rabbit lover, but I think the one Im gonna miss the most is him whom's made of the same stardust as myself (that rainbow after the rain, that 4.87). And the karaoke sesh after work on my last day with the Quality girls marked the end of my nine months stint at AbbVie. This, is another form of my perfect ending. You know, time flies and Im gonna miss that place after all but I gotta go and grow.
OKIEZ THIS IS AN UNEXPECTEDLY SUPER DUPER LONG POST - it took me different sittings to write this one post coz I didn't wanna miss anything out (hey this is the last time I'm gonna talk about AbbVie so bear with me, and kudos to you if you have managed to read thus far) but no, some feelings, some experiences I still keep to myself. Do allow me that. And with that, I wish for the very best for all of them, for all of us.
❤️ MORE PHOTOS BELOW ❤️
goodbye goodbye goodbye
xx